Ex - June 26 2023

 

Ex

June 26 2023

I never understood

how love can change like this,

flipping from white to black

forbearance to anger.

How the person

most important in the world

can become the object of hate

revulsion, regret,

still filling your field of vision

but shaded in red;

distant, yet still

as present as ever.

It's as if hate and love

were inextricably bound.

If opposites attract

then extreme emotions come in pairs,

contending poles

defining each other

but what they're not.

Our past selves, and who we've become,

jealous, contentious, resentful.

If love is uplifting

then perhaps we should say

falling in hate

instead of love.

You want to believe that causing hurt

will expiate the pain,

but know the only one you'll really harm

is yourself.

And while love is blind

hate is a death ray,

a white hot glare

intense enough

to burn the eyes.

I gaze into the mirror

and turn it on myself.

The man

who thought he was in love,

never imagining

the darkness

that kept his passion company

while hiding in the shadows.

Could never have known

what he was capable of.

Never having been through this, I've always struggled to understand the extreme acrimony in a bad divorce. How the same person who was once your soulmate, forever partner, and love of your life, has somehow become such an object of anger, hate, and vengefulness.

This poem was inspired by a very different falling out. But I thought the scenario of romantic love would be far more familiar to the reader than anything else.