Dorothy H. - April 18 2024

 

Dorothy H.

April 18 2024

I met him once

but only in passing;

a brief introduction

then briskly on his way.

Nevertheless, I’ve always been bad at names

and don’t remember his.

What I do recall

is a cool glare;

narrowed eyes

that seemed to be sizing me up,

a vaguely hostile air.

Or is this all retrospect;

how memory is shaped

by subsequent events?

The man

who killed my beautiful friend

in the bed they shared

one horrible night.

At least a gun would have been merciful;

but he used a knife

and took his time.

I was told

that in the aftermath

he killed himself.

Although I never cared

how he met his end;

suicide, or life sentence

he was dead to me already.

In fact, I still don’t know his name.

I fear there are too many men like that.

The possessive kind

who are jealous and insecure.

Men who kill their feelings

by drinking too much

or taking drugs.

Men with more testosterone

than love.

They call it femicide.

A legal sounding word

so clinical

it seems to sanitize a heinous crime.

Because even fresh blood

is hard to get out.

And not even the sharpest knife

cuts clean.

This article about raising awareness about femicide (see the link below) brought up memories of Dorothy, who was my friend and colleague. It happened in a distant city. I learned of it late, and it struck me as inconceivable, utterly out of the blue, something that happened to different sort of people than her: a strong, worldly, highly accomplished professional woman.

The en passant meeting seems clear to me. But I’m suspicious enough of memory (in general, and mine in particular!) that it may very well not have happened. But the “dead to me” part is very true. Although I have to add that suicide was probably better than the slowly turning wheels of the criminal justice system, endless appeals, and early release. The only clean thing about the whole horrible affair.

I’m not sure “epidemic”, as in the article, is technically correct. The word implies a dramatic increase above historic trends. But neither men nor intimate relationships have changed. So perhaps it’s always been like this. It’s just that no one thought to notice.

https://globe2go.pressreader.com/article/281706914729103