Ageing Gracefully - Sept 14 2021

 

Ageing Gracefully

Sept 14 2021

I thought that age would mellow me.

More understanding

of human frailty.

More empathy and tolerance.

More patient

and better able to take the long view,

deferring gratification

resisting the passions of youth.

I thought age would make me wise

comfortable in my skin.

An old man

I would sit back, and look out on the world,

a bemused smile lighting my face,

distilled pearls of wisdom

issuing from my lips.

I'd be a fat judicious Buddha,

arms folded contentedly

across my ample belly.

But I have failed,

and find my cynicism

and misanthropy

are greater than they ever were,

short with my fellow travellers

and aghast at the state of the world.

If only I could detach,

throw up my hands

and say to hell with it;

ignore the lunatics

and greedy kleptocrats,

the self-centred

and power mad,

the degenerate

and unrepentant

who repeatedly get away with it.

I still bear the burden

of caring too much,

yet am cursed by my lack of agency

and the feeling it's to late

for change that makes a difference.

Someone once quipped

old age isn't for sissies

and I cannot disagree.

Life doesn't get easier.

The passion still burns,

but the candle flickers

casting more heat than light;

its fuel depleted,

its fitful shadows

dancing grimly in the dark.

It was Bette Davis who said it, or is reputed to have. An actress from before my time, but whose name and celebrity seem to have persisted. I've also seem her quoted as saying Old age ain't no place for sissies . . . which has a much more pithy ring to it! The quote may be attributed to her, but the sentiments expressed in the poem are very much mine.